It's really cool when someone reads this diary, and takes something I've written about as inspiration to write something themselves. In the last couple of days, Rockabillie and imadad2 have written a couple of very good entries based on things they read here. Now we're cookin' with gas!

Imadad2 took yesterday's Virgin Chronicles entry as a basis for talking about his own misadventures with the uninitiated young ladies back in the day. I tell you, that guy has a million stories, I'm glad I gave him a reason to dig up a couple of them out of his own mental archives. The interesting thing about this entry, though, is that it also touches on the theme of regretting opportunities you let pass you by, which I talked about here and again here.

Rockabillie went all the way back to my first real entry, because a couple of things I said there really seem to have spoken to him. He very insightfully notes that we men live a particularly lonely existence in some ways. He's right on the money there, I think. I've always envied the women I know, because virtually every single one of them has friends that they can share some of their most personal thoughts and intimate feelings. I've never, ever had a friend like that, nor have most men, I suspect.

For instance, Mary Anne's best friend is someone she's known since her first year of college (a guy, actually - but he's gay, so I'm counting him as an honorary woman in this example). She told me a while after we started going out that she'd been talking to him about our relationship, and she'd told him that he had really missed out when I was born a straight guy (her best friend is apparently a bit of a "size queen"). While that was - as intended - both funny and flattering, I simply cannot imagine discussing the intimate details of my sex partner's anatomy and our sex life with any of my guy friends (instead, I just go online and describe it in intimate detail for any yahoo with a computer).

In fact, there's one friend I have, one of my very best friends, actually. Randomly, he and Mary Anne hooked up at least once several years before she and I got involved. Now, if we were chicks, there would have been endless discussions about this fact between us. But because we're guys, neither of us has ever mentioned it when we've talked. In fact, I have no idea if he even knows that I know about it or not (so he could in theory have been keeping quiet about it because he doesn't want to get her in trouble in case she'd never mentioned it to me). Now, I don't really care that they fooled around a bit years ago - but I'd probably be happier if it was out in the open between us (and because I'm curious to hear his side of the story - what I've just told you about it is basically as much as she's told me about it). But we're guys, we just can't do that. Or at least I feel like I can't do that. It's ridiculous, but the cultural conditioning against revealing any sort of personal weakness is just too strong to overcome. Or something like that.

As a result, we men lead lives that are at the core, very lonely. Like many husbands, my wife is my best friend. But when I need to talk *about* her, I don't have anyone that I can talk to. When I need to talk about things that she can't know about, I *really* don't have anyone I can talk to. But it seems like she has at least a dozen girlfriends on call that she can talk to any time she needs a sympathetic ear.

(Incidentally, this is why you should try really hard to be nice to your woman's girlfriends - it helps when they like you, because they will often take your side when the little woman is acting ridiculous about something completely random.)

Anyway.

Back to imadad2 for a minute. He mentions up front that when he was younger, he didn't really have any interest in nailing any virgins, because they wouldn't know what the heck they were doing - he was looking for girls who had already experimented with sex, who wanted sex, and who were good at sex. He has a point there - for me, I wouldn't say that my first experience with any of the Super Six was particularly great (with the possible exception of Ally, but only because that was my first time too).

Yeah, those first times weren't that great for me, and by and large they weren't that great for the girls, either (I suspect most of the women who read this had a "first time" experience that was less than overwhleming - hit the comments if you'd like to share). That wasn't really the point though. What I was trying to do with each of them is make it as positive of an experience as possible. Just because of the mechanics of what physically happens the first time a girl has sex, it's probably not going to be that enjoyable (occasional reports are that it is, but I'd say those are the minority). But if it wasn't going to be great, I did want it to be special. When you fuck a virgin, in a way you're guaranteeing yourself instant immortality in her mind. I've been with women - hell, I married one - who try as they might couldn't remember every guy they ever had sex with. But nobody ever forgets their first. So when they remembered me, I wanted them to do it with a smile on their face. I hope it was successful.

Next week: Actual sex stories! I promise!

A Return of Regular Action? - 2005-03-31
Patience Rewarded - 2005-03-29
Infidelity... It's Everywhere - 2005-03-25
3 A.M. Eternal (KLF is gonna rock you!) - 2005-03-24
A Different Twist - 2005-03-21