Blah. I'm in a mood today. Partly depressed, partly horny. I haven't gotten laid in two and a half weeks. This doesn't seem to bother anyone besides me. Fuck.

I work in an industry which is traditionally mostly male. For whatever reason, however, in most of the places I've worked there have been quite a few women working there too. For the past three years, in fact, I've mostly worked under women. (No, not like that - though in a couple of cases I wouldn't have minded!)

Now, I've never hooked up with anyone I work with - the risks are just too great, in my book. If you get involved with someone at the office, coworkers are bound to notice eventually, and then your sex life becomes office gossip. That's never a good position to be in if you're trying to engage in discreet adultery - if people know, sooner or later your spouse is likely to find out. And what happens if you make an advance and get shot down, or if you and your co-worker/lover break up? In the outside world, you can just cut that person out of your life - don't call them, don't take their calls if they call you, don't see them, whatever. At work, you're stuck with that person even if they turn out to be some crazy stalker type. Thanks, but no thanks. I suppose you could always quit, but in today's world where jobs are going overseas at warp speed, it's not very easy to find a new one, especially one that pays well.

Then of course, in today's society, you have the ever-present specter of sexual harassment looming over everything. A couple of years ago I worked in a place where I had an office that looked out into the hall that everyone in my department had to walk through to get to their offices from the outside. I had a window into the hall and I sat facing it, so all day long I watched everyone go back and forth. There were these two girls who did data entry, and one of them was absolutely smoking hot. Long brown hair, big brown eyes, very pretty face, a great ass, and HUGE tits. Every time she walked by, it was almost impossible for me to not stare at her. After a while, I got to the point where I was worried that she was going to complain about me staring at her - she'd usually glance in as she walked by, and more often than not she'd catch me looking at her. The sad thing was that the whole situation made me too nervous to even make small talk with her, which is just ridiculous.

Of course, then you have guys like this dude, Eric, that my friend Stacey used to fuck (naturally, I used to fuck Stacey too, but this was a different guy). He was perpetually hitting on girls that he worked with, to the point that he's been written up for sexual harassment on, I think, three separate occasions. I lost touch with Stacey after she left her husband and moved in with some other guy, but I doubt Eric is still employed there. I was amazed he hadn't been fired already. What a dumbass.

Every office seems to have its designated hottie. Where I work now it's Leigh, who's a 37-year-old petite blonde. She is smoking hot, and extremely sweet. She has a flawless body, and she's drop-dead gorgeous to boot. I don't think she's married, but she wasn't single the last time I obliquely inquired, which was a long time ago. I've been lucky enough to work with her on a few things, so I get to visit her with an actual reason, not just to leer at her. To make things worse, she flirts like a pro - lots of smiling and winking, and she's apt to pat me on the shoulder or the elbow when she's leaving after we've been sitting together discussing some work. It's maddening, but enjoyable. If I was ever going to break the no-coworker rule, I'd throw it away for Leigh in a heartbeat. But it'll never happen.

While I don't work with anyone else who's a world-class hottie like Leigh, I do have several other women I work with who are quite easy on the eyes. Four in particular, who I've worked with pretty closely (actually there are four others, but I've only worked with them sporadically on a couple of projects and I don't see them every day, so I'm not counting them) tend to make me lose my concentration when they walk by.

Here's the part where I realize I'm getting old. These four women are between 43 and 55 years old (and interestingly, the hottest one is also the oldest, and the least-hot is the youngest - go figure). Three of them are grandmothers, for God's sake! Two of them are or were nominally my boss, which made for an interesting dynamic, at least for me.

I tell you, I've come a long way from screwing horny teenage sluts for hours on end. Sigh.

Oh well. On the bright side, I don't seem to have started losing my hair yet, God blessed me with above-average equipment (or so I am told) and it doesn't yet require Viagra to work reliably -not that I've done much more than run the engine a little bit while still parked in the garage for a couple of weeks now.

I'm sorry there wasn't any sex in this entry, but the good news is that in writing it I came up with two other things to write about in the future, and each of those topics has a good sex story to go along with it, so hang in there. There's a decent chance that I won't suck quite so thoroughly later this week or sometime next week.

(Quick update: I just had to sit through a meeting with three of the four women I mentioned above. I had a hard time paying attention.)

A Return of Regular Action? - 2005-03-31
Patience Rewarded - 2005-03-29
Infidelity... It's Everywhere - 2005-03-25
3 A.M. Eternal (KLF is gonna rock you!) - 2005-03-24
A Different Twist - 2005-03-21